So I'm basically starting this blog as a means of self-reflection in order to improve my skills as a teacher of youths. I consider myself an introspective person, able to look honestly at my self and dissect my private thoughts without lying to myself. When I feel that embarrassed tug, where I want to pull away from the truth that is lurking in the recesses of my mind, I only delve deeper and face it head on. I intend to be painfully honest with this blog, and this is the first in a series of posts which will catalog of my experiences at my internship, the last hurdle before I can truly call myself "librarian." I figured having the day off for Florida's "snow day" was the perfect formula for finally beginning this blog I've been thinking about for so long. Plus, I just took a Buzzfeed quiz that told me that the career I should actually have is writer, and the picture for that profession was Tina Fey so I basically had to.
"The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright--
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night." - Lewis Carroll
This is one of my favorite quotations, from one of my favorite poems, for which this blog is named. I think it fits what I've been feeling in my first few weeks in my internship at a school library. I can do everything I know to do, but I still have a lot to learn; there's still some important elements incubating before I can emerge victoriously from the egg of graduate school into the real world of being a school librarian who doesn't suck.
The Details
First, my internship is at a K-12 Charter school, chartered in part by my University's College of Education as a research "lab" school. I had been volunteering in this library for almost a year before my internship was secured, and Jennifer Underhill, author of the Three Ring Library Blog, is my mentor and guide through all of this. I shall call her JU from now on. I couldn't have asked for a better mentor than JU: I admire her ability to get. things. done. She's got gumption (I've always wanted people to say that of me), and she challenges me daily. I have been creating displays, cataloging, learning some nitty-gritty inner-workings stuff, teaching, observing, and running the weekly Middle School Book Club.
This week was my fourth week interning (Monday afternoons, and all day Tuesday and Wednesday), and so JU filled out my first evaluation form. We went over it together, and there wasn't anything that I disagreed with. We both agreed that I needed to work on the teaching aspect of things. Now, last Friday I taught a whole days worth (actually, just five forty-five minute class periods) on the merits of Creative Commons and Public Domain resources for the middle and high school students' video productions; and after watching JU teach a lesson on the FINDS research model and guiding them through a KWHL chart on Monday, I tried my hand at the same lesson for third graders. We intended that I would be filmed teaching it again today, but alas, school was cancelled due to inclement weather.
I have also started observing classroom teachers, especially paying attention to their classroom management. I have learned that everyone's a little different but they all are successful because they have this underlying sense of purpose to the day. They want the kids to know this stuff, so they make sure it gets taught. Some teachers have gimmicks, some have been at it so long that they can simply give "the look" to set things right. Most of them seem to found their classroom management on having the respect of their kids. Maybe it comes naturally through familiarity but I've been told numerous times that you can't be insincere with your students, and that seems to be true of these teachers, especially as the kids mature.
Things I need to work on:
Being more deliberate in my word choice - part of that is thinking through what questions might arise
Being more attentive to the students' status as I'm teaching - are they following me?; am I calling on everyone equally?; am I shushing when I should be listening?
My pacing - I'm still focused on getting through the lesson foremost
Assessments - I wasn't required to take a course in assessments and it's something I'm definitely lacking
Things I am proud of myself for:
Being able to teach without my notes because I know what I'm talking about.
My ideas.
Writing this blog post.
That I still want to do this even though it's not going to be easy. Yeah, I just said that and I mean it.
I leave you with this quote from Jake the dog: "Dude, sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something."
